"Finding Yourself..."

I've always been curious about this notion of "finding yourself." You are with yourself every day. It is impossible to lose yourself! It is more accurate to think in terms of contemplating the type of person you would like to be with every day, the type of person you would like to be...and then practice behaving in ways that create that person. Then you can always be assured of being with someone you can be proud of, of being someone you can be proud of! Life is an intentional endeavor which requires intentional decisions about how we each want to behave, and how we each want to be seen by ourselves and others. If we make conscious, intentional decisions about our lives, we benefit from having lives we can be proud of. In doing so, we cultivate quality relationships, both with ourselves, and with others!

Forgiveness

We are on this planet with other people. It is hard to avoid other people, and, in fact, I believe having good relationships with others is the only way to find joy, purpose, and happiness in life.
So...what to do when other people do stupid, hurtful, and "unforgivable" things, especially if it feels like it is being done to you? The only answer: Forgive. We are all imperfect, mischievous creatures and not to forgive means acquiring too many people you have to avoid, have angry thoughts toward or about, and with whom you can't be in relationship. It's exhausting! So...how to forgive. Forgiveness is not forgetting. (After all, I'm not suggesting amnesia!) Forgiveness is not condoning whatever horrible thing you feel has been done or said to you. Forgiveness is just about letting it go and acknowledging that we are all human and prone to doing stupid, thoughtless things. Recognizing that it is really not about you when someone behaves poorly, but is the other person's decision how to behave in the world helps create some distance between you and whatever was done or said. Think about it. Get over it, and move on to keeping your connection with others...as many "others" as possible! You will ultimately feel better, and your life will improve! I promise it will!